1.25.12

It has been quite a while since I've been able to do any journaling here as Don was in the hospital for 11 days.  He is having a very hard time both physically and emotionally.  He is noticeably weaker and is fighting a vague pain in his mid-left back, his cough remain fierce and very productive, his heart has weakened since his last hospitalization in October.  When this is all added to the fact that we have setup a sickroom downstairs just off the kitchen, which includes a hospital bed, well...it's just hard for my poor Don to absorb and maintain a smile.  But, by golly, he's doing his best to project a positive attitude and stay upbeat.

We made the decision this week to accept the recommendation of our doctor and bring in hospice services.  We haven't met with them yet, as they were just notified by the nurse today but will be calling tomorrow or Friday.  We have questions for them, but I'm in hopes that they may have some innovative ways for Don's care to be completed more efficiently and perhaps they will have something to add to what we have already setup.

Tomorrow someone is coming to the house to cut Don's hair and treat his scalp.  The mans name is O.G. and he cuts my hair also.  He has given me some tips on setting up for tomorrow, but the main point is that Don will get his hair cut.  Today, the assoc. pastor visited and I was somewhat surprised at the questions Don asked about lifetime choices and personal changes since his teen years.  I'm so happy that he feels comfortable and at ease with Joe and feels he is able to shed any burdens he feels he is carrying.

I am feeling pressure more and more.  I can't afford to hire someone to clean the house but I may have to do it anyway.  There just is no time for that activity and, I'm sorry to say, there just is not enough energy left for that activity.  Being a caregiver is a huge strain on the psyche as well as the body.

May the Lord bless thee and me.  May He continue to embrace us during our trials.  We must remember to trust in Lord and know that He will protect us, encourage us, keep us safe.  Our fears will be set aside and gladness will be our memories.  Amen.

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